Does anyone else wonder why synchronized swimming is an Olympic sport? I know its athletically difficult, but it still doesn't make any sense: how about synchronized bowling? And what if one swimmer in a pair drowns; does the other one have to drown too?
You all know what I think about running. Swimming is much the same, with the added bonus that if you stop you might die. Yet it has cardio and strength training advantages for us climbers and won't kill your knees like running. You'll just get genetically damaged from all the chlorine and grow another set of testicles. But hey, who couldn't use that? Anyway, if you're like me and swim as well as you run – i.e. barely – you'll need some mechanical assistance. That's where the Finis Zoomers come in. The Zoomers are training fins, a lot smaller than diving fins and even smaller than some other training fins.
Despite their small size they're a popular choice among masochists and triathletes: wait, that was redundant. Zoomers allow you to make forward progress enough to work on your stroke. They come in blue, for fitness and distance training, and in red, for advanced, competitive swimmers. You'll notice I put a picture of the red ones up to look cool, but I use the blue ones for reasons that should be obvious at this point. They work as advertised; after a few sessions in the pool with Zoomers on they have noticably helped me to improve my freestyle. Now I just have to get rid of the yellow ducky floats on my arms and start eating 12,000 calories a day – oh, I already do that – and I can be the next Phelps.